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| This will make more sense momentarily. |
If anything,
2012 will be marked as the year that all the things in our house decided to
break. All the things. If you’ll remember correctly, the dryer broke (and J
tried to fix it himself, with it still PLUGGED IN), the
dishwasher broke, I started sticking a pencil in the washer to combat the
broken door sensor (maybe I didn’t tell you about that one), and the boys’
shower decided to flood the house. Oh, and there was the day in July that
the air conditioner decided to break when it was 106 degrees. Cannot forget the
air conditioner.
And this is
how we know the Mayans were right. And the fact that global climate change is
real and my air conditioner wanted to remind me of that fact.
I keep
trying to tell myself that this IS better than 2010-2011—the year of the
vermin.
This week,
though, the universe has really ratcheted it up a notch. On Saturday it became
apparent the bathroom sink in the boys’ bathroom wouldn’t drain. On Sunday K
accidentally broke the mechanism on the vacuum that holds it upright. On Monday
the upper arm in the dishwasher stopped working again. On Tuesday J reports he
experienced a loud boom (not a backfire) in his old car (or, if you were
speaking with K, his future car), and now it makes a bumping noise all the
time. We think he might have knocked the muffler loose, although we don’t know
how. Fortunately, he had the car inspected and tagged THE DAY BEFORE THIS
HAPPENED. Thank goodness I was ahead of schedule with the DMV for the first
time ever.
Then, on
Wednesday, it became obvious that the washer 1) is done with the pencil trick,
thank-you-very-much, and 2) is no longer agitating. I would try to wheedle a
new set out of my husband (can you say Electrolux???) since our set is well
over a decade old, if it weren’t for the fact that all the things are breaking!
All the
things. Did I mention that the thermostat in my office is acting super-wonky? I
think this all has something to do with me. That or I’m getting paranoid.
Sigh.
There is
good news, however. Last night I jumped on Twitter (I had no intention of
watching Grey’s Anatomy, but wanted to see everyone tweet about it) to amuse myself
and happened into a special Thursday night edition of #wineparty. Do you
remember how I told you I found my Twitter
tribe in #wineparty? I was super excited for the extra night of Twitter
conversation, but then I found out that Kit from Blogging Dangerously was hosting
the special night of #wineparty because Oreck was sponsoring it, and giving
away a free vacuum. Let me repeat: FREE VACUUM.
I desperately
wanted to win the free vacuum, but I don’t really win things. I never win
things, actually. I can’t even win a free lottery ticket or a round of bingo.
So, I didn’t get my hopes up. I just planned on having a good time discussing who
actually does the vacuuming in our respective households and trying to gross
each other out with the weirdest crap to be tracked in by the kids and the
animals. Then we started talking about homecoming (because that seems to be
this weekend for the entire world) and heated floor installation and everything
else under the sun because this is how #wineparty works.
And how I became
influential in Roomba and hugging chipmunks on @klout. But I digress…
After a while
Kit decided to draw her winner from all those participating, and we all did the
traditional waving of the arms in the air saying, “Pick me! Pick me!” and low
and behold… she picked me.
Me. With all
the broken things and no luck at winning things.
I am getting
a free vacuum! That free vacuum in the picture. With the steam mop thingie I’ve
always wanted (since we have cream tile floors in all three bathrooms, the
foyer and the kitchen and two boys and a big black dog). Oreck is going to send
this to my house and I will get one step closer to not having all the things
broken at the same time.
And maybe I’ll
start vacuuming and mopping my floors, for a change… And yes, I'll totally be reviewing this (without being asked).
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